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What do hostage negotiators, dogs, and tortoises have in common?

They all understand the power of slowing down.

As I’ve mentioned before, so many of us are ‘busy’ and ‘rushing’.

I’ve also had the experience of being accused of not caring about someone, simply because I seemed ‘too busy’.

It is easy to rush through conversations and life in general. But as Chris Voss highlights in “Never Split the Difference,” slowing down can be life or death important.

“If we’re too much in a hurry, people can feel as if they’re not being heard, and we risk undermining the rapport and trust we’ve built… When you slow the process down, you also calm it down. After all, if someone is talking, they’re not shooting.”

When we slow down, we create space for deeper understanding, better connection, and more thoughtful responses. It allows us to:

  • Listen deeply: Truly hear what the other person is saying and what they’re not saying.
  • Ask calibrated questions: These encourage the other person to think and reveal more information.
  • Influence: By slowing the pace, we can steer the conversation more effectively.
  • “Win the race”: As the tortoise and the hare remind us.
  • Enjoy life: As our dogs teach us.

This principle doesn’t just apply to negotiations. In life, slowing down helps us appreciate the journey, build stronger relationships, and make better decisions.

So, whether you’re negotiating a deal or walking your dog, (or observing a tortoise), remember to breathe, listen, and slow it down. You’ll be surprised at how much more you can achieve.

#Leadership #Negotiation #EffectiveCommunication #Mindfulness #Time #Listen #Care #Influence #EnjoyLife #BePhenomenal #MakeAMeaningfulDifference

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